Since starting this blog, my practice has been to write an annual summary of the recent year’s posts. This year’s theme, “Wisdom for Men” was purposely geared to a more general audience of men, regardless of their religious affiliation or spirituality. But I realized there is still work to do. Despite what you read in the media, too many males are falling behind in school, at work, and in their families. They are struggling with loneliness, isolation, abuse, and addictions. Even after nearly 300 posts, self-publishing a book, and several speaking engagements, men still need deeper, more authentic friendships because the problems of boys and men persist.
Males are Struggling
In his recent book, Of Boys and Men: Why the Modern Male Is Struggling, Why It Matters, and What to Do About It, Richard Reeves examines the alarming trends well known to social scientists but not present in the public discourse. Studies show an increase in male suicide and a decline in the mental and physical health of males of all age groups. Boys underperform in school and now attend college at rates much lower than women. Women earn 15% more bachelor’s degrees than men. Real wages for men have declined by 14% since 1979, while women’s wages have grown. Reeves specifically chronicles the fortunes of black boys and men, which have fallen farthest. He suggests males need better support from government policies and school systems. His book also notes the hostility narrative often directed at men today, such as labeling most normal male behavior as “toxic masculinity.”
To reverse these trends, I believe we must teach boys and men the virtues of manhood, regardless of their views about a higher power, multiple gods, or nothing at all. When every man, –young and old, single and married, religious or not, has a small group of trusted friends, he finds purpose. He has a “band of brothers” to mentor and teach others how to thrive, not just survive.
6 Years and Counting
Of course, I still believe men are at their best with “GodBuddies” which are deeper, more authentic friendships with men who are learning to become more like Jesus. But rather than detailing the first six years of my blog, here are the links to the summaries for each year. Each contains links to the most important posts that support the importance of better male friendships.
- 2019: The Beginning of GodBuddies: Why Men Need Friends
- 2020: An “Upside-Down” Year of Friendship and Challenges
- 2021: My Journey Through The MANual: Lessons from The Bible
- 2022: The Value of Friendships: Examples from Sports, Politics, Media and Literature
- 2023: A Roadmap to Better Manhood
My focus for 2024 became “Wisdom for Men,” with a variety of posts on manhood. By no means do I profess to have all the answers. Nor do I want you to think I have life figured out. I simply wanted to reach men with a slightly different message based on what I read, heard, and experienced throughout the year.
Wisdom for Men
I started the year with Good Men Fight Against Injustice and Don’t Boo or Criticize People. However, I criticized the characterization of men in a popular movie in a post titled, Is Ken a “Hollow” Man? I followed it with two ways to maturity for men about the Success Sequence for Men and Living Above The Influence.
On the 10th anniversary of the death of my good friend, I updated an older post, Missing My GodBuddy since Chris had a huge impact after a struggle with workaholism that teetered on depression. I also spoke to an Adult Ed class at a church in Alabama. It was a mixed-gender speaking engagement about male friendships which made for interesting questions.
In May, I provided some suggestions in A Godly Man’s Guide to Mother’s Day and Remembering Sacrifice and Love on Memorial Day. In June, I wrote about Honoring Your Father which is also Men’s Health Awareness Month. July featured The “True Freedom” of Independence Day here in the U.S. I also reflected on Living in a World with No Religion and United in Love, Divided by Hate after a summer vacation in Europe. Later that month, I was honored to preach at a local church about the Covenantal Friendships Like Jonathan and David; two men in the Bible whose relationship is often misunderstood.
More Wisdom
Later in the summer, I wrote Why Do Guys Tease Each Other?, Must You Be “Broken” Before You Are Remade? and Why Don’t Men Read. I then pondered some interesting questions about why men resist change. This led to a few posts that Fear: He is a Liar and Developing a Healthy Fear since Conquering Your Fear of Change.
What followed was a series on Becoming a Well-Balanced Man. I explained The Benefits of Becoming a Balanced Man. I then detailed the importance of being Emotionally, Mentally, Physically, Financially, Socially, and Spiritually stable. I also suggested that Friends Help Each Other Become Well-Balanced.
I began wrapping up the year with a post, Is It Good to be a Lone Wolf? about being a “Sigma male.” That condition could be one reason Many Boys and Men are Struggling. However, I also stated Men are Not (Solely) to Blame for The Crisis of Fatherlessness in America. Too many of us experienced The Pain of An Absent Father or carry forward The Effects of Being Overly-Bonded with Mom. So I suggested Rethinking Your Parents’ Stories since your dad and mom likely had wounds from their past as well.
Become a Better Friend and Mentor
All told, I probably could have concluded the year on the value of being a mentor. But as I continue to study the problems males face, I still believe there is a need for better male friendships. Our obligation as godly men is to share our experiences (both good and bad) with other men. So go become a friend and mentor or find someone with whom you can deepen your friendship. Neither of you will regret it
As always, feel free to share my blog with anyone who would benefit from learning the importance of having better friendships. Of course, I’m grateful when you purchase my book, give a copy to friends, or study it in your men’s group. Thanks for your support. See you again next year!
[Featured Photo by Nick Fewings on Unsplash]
