I recently stumbled across a new concept called the Sigma Male. Apparently, it’s a slang term used on the internet and in schools to describe a new-age “lone wolf” male. The Sigma mindset has gained traction due to its independence and self-reliance. But is this isolating approach a good thing for men? Is it creating a culture of immature males who are detached from traditional social hierarchies and void of deeper relationships. This post explains the differences in the various male archetypes and why men really need better friendships to avoid becoming a Sigma Male.
Understanding Male Personality Types
Scholars and pop culture often categorize male personalities into seven main archetypes by Greek letter such as Alpha, Beta, Delta, Gamma, Omega, Zeta, and now Sigma Males (Read more in From Alpha to Omega: A Guide to the 7 Male Personalities which describes these personality traits, careers at which each would excel, examples from pop culture, and the potential pitfalls of each).
Its important to keep these archetypes in perspective though. Horoscopes and personality tests suggest there is an ideal for everyone and that you can change your archetype to thrive in a “dog-eat-dog” world today. But most of these theories don’t have a scientific basis. Some online communities push the idea that a rigid social hierarchy promotes victimizing and misogynistic views. Some extremist groups target certain personality types to promote hate. Political parties count on votes from particular male archetypes. Even some medical organizations like the American Psychological Association suggest that traditional masculinity is “toxic.”
These approaches are all up for debate but I will simply use the Sigma Male archetype to support my case that men need better male friendships, what I call GodBuddies.
What is a Sigma Male?
The Sigma Male romanticized in popular American movies and books is portrayed as a powerful lone wolf who plays by a different set of rules. He is a strong and silent type who’s most identifiable personality traits are independence, self-reliance, and a penchant for solitude. Recent depictions in movies include John Wick, the action thriller starring Keanu Reeves, Matt Damon in the Jason Bourne franchise, and Ben Affleck’s portal of Bruce Wayne in Batman. Others include the popular Jack Reacher books by author Lee Child and the main characters in games such as Grand Theft Auto and Halo. Real-life sigmas include Steve Jobs, Elon Musk, and Leonardo da Vinci. Some consider controversial social media personality Andrew Tate a Sigma Male.
Sigma Males are very confident like Alphas, but aren’t interested in power or social status. They have enough life experience to follow their own moral compass and spend their time helping other people discover their inner power. Their natural wit, intuition, and sense of persuasion earn them the respect of their peers (though they’re comfortable enough in themselves not to need it). They are bold, nurturing, and wise. The Sigma Male has an intriguing and mysterious draw for many.
But it also has a dark side.
The Danger of Being a “Lone Wolf”
Every personality type comes with traits that are critical to understanding the full spectrum of the men. Each has characteristics that are positive but each also has a “dark side.” While the Sigma Male’s allure lies in his mysterious nature and ability to be self-contained, their detachment from traditional social hierarchies has several negative effect that include:
- Tendency Towards Isolation
- Over-Reliance on Rational Thinking
- Excessive Secrecy and Privacy
- Overly Critical and Judgmental Attitude
- Difficulty in Adhering to Social Norms
- Prone to Cynicism and Skepticism
- Risk of Overconfidence and Arrogance
- Tendency Towards Emotional Detachment
These lesser-known aspects offer insights into the potentially harmful traits that can impact the life of a Sigma Male. Each may contribute to their loneliness and mental condition that creates the need for closer, more authentic friendships.
Men Need to Run in a Pack
Studies show that wolves are stronger because they are pack animals. Once a wolf leaves its pack, they are more dangerous to humans because they become desperate for food. It may be more likely to view humans as potential prey, making encounters potentially more risky even though even lone wolves generally avoid humans and will attack only if they feel threatened or cornered. A lone wolf also becomes weak and can actually get eaten by other wolves in the game of survival.
The truth is, the Sigma Male is just another example of romanticizing loneliness. Lone wolf males decide to isolate on purpose, believing that it is healthy and that focusing solely on themselves is the right way to survive. The Sigma mindset comes when a Beta Male’s inferiority complex is met with the arrogance of an Alpha Male. It is when a Beta Male, Bands together with other Beta Males who are trying to appear more like an Alpha. Its when a group of Beta’s become passive or hide behind their weaknesses. This mindset or attitude becomes harmful when any male — regardless of their personality type, rejects their responsibilities as a man, and emotionally or physically abuses others.
So don’t become a lone wolf. Surrounded yourself with a group healthy and mature men to do life with and do more than just survive. Learn to thrive in this world that needs better men. More godly men. More men with GodBuddies.
[Feature Photo by Ray Hennessy on Unsplash]
