In my last post with Reflections on Year 6 of this blog, I stated that too many men still fail in school, at work, and in their families. The increase in loneliness and isolation has created a culture that enables guys to hide behind a mask, which keeps others from knowing them well enough to know when they struggle. So this year, I want to double down on my theory that men need deeper, authentic friendships. This post kicks off the new year with an interesting video about the decline of friendship in America. It also includes facts about loneliness and why we must help connect young males in relationships with more mature men. With a renewed focus on having better friendships, our boys and men, our girls and women, and our families, can all do better.
Men Struggle with Stress and Loneliness
According to recent studies, around 57% of men report feeling lonely. Another significant finding is that 15% of men claim to have no close friends at all; a number significantly higher since 1990. Men struggle with workaholism and depression from the stress of trying to be good husbands, fathers, and workers. We may not report our loneliness or discuss our feelings as frequently as females, but men need similar support and help.
Sadly, the trends are disturbing among boys and young males and getting worse in older men. We’ve seen a dramatic rise in the “deaths of despair” from suicide, drug and alcohol abuse, and real-wage decline. Some suggest this has also led to an increase in “unmanly” behavior, irrational political ideologies, and “toxic” masculinity. Regardless of what you believe or how the media portrays boys and men, caring for male issues as equally as we support females is not a zero-sum game. We need everyone to help change these trends.
Male Friendships are Fragile
I’ve recently become a fan of Richard Reeves, author Of Boys and Men: Why the Modern Male Is Struggling, Why It Matters, and What to Do about It. As founder of the American Institute for Boys and Man (AIBM), Reeves created this great video for a post titled, the fragile beauty of male friendship on the AIBM website.
Reeves’ book, video, and post describe the revealing facts about why men are struggling and the downsides to our mental, emotional, and physical health. Each supports my theory about the need for better friendships, especially for men.
Everyone Benefits from Better Friendships
In the aforementioned post, Reeves states, “The very definition of a friendship is a relationship where there is nothing in it for you, other than the relationship itself.” I don’t disagree with Reeves on that point: any relationship should be about the other person.
However, I believe we become better men through deeper, more authentic friendships. This does not mean we need more Facebook Friends or casual acquaintances at work, the golf course, or the bar. It means making and keeping friendships with good men who will mentor, teach, and coach us on becoming mature and responsible men. So let’s make 2025 the year to develop friendships with other men who help each other grow into mature adult men that the world needs more of today.
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You can also purchase a copy of my book, Get Out Of Your Man Cave: The Crisis of Male Friendship. Find practical ways to develop closer, more genuine relationships that help us become better men. While based on biblical principles and standards for living from Jesus Christ, the book is valuable to everyone. Get the ebook or printed copy on Amazon.
Click here or on the picture of the book to get a signed copy. I also offer discounts on bulk orders for your men’s group.
Thanks for your support!
